So I spent the last week taking my son in for an accident with a blender, excuse me, a smoothie maker (side note people keep asking me if it's like the magic bullet, I say "no" only because I thought the magic bullet was some sort of sex toy!). He's attempting to make a smoothie, leaves the blade on the console of the machine, his elbow slips and the rest is all screaming, blood dripping down arm, rush to E.R. (well as "rush" as you can with a sick baby and a 3yr old). E.R. doc was awesome in the frat boy sense. He was 6'4", kinda good looking in the I still play basketball and down some brews with my buds Dad kinda way and very talkative and personable. I have to admit he was much more attractive after seeing us merely 15 minutes after our arrival. Has anyone ever gotten in and out of an ER in less than four hours? I went in while pregnant with my 1yr old diva because I could not keep any food down. I think I sat with a garbage between my legs for 3hrs in the waiting room. Then once moved into the actual E.R. I waited for another 45 minutes for someone to come in, it was the registration people not even the nurse. Once finally poked and prodded the doc orders me up a Zofran and sends me home. Total visit 5.5hrs, total time spent with actual hospital staff approximate 18 minutes, total cost after insurance, $370 big ones. Anyway I digress.
I'm reading Candy Girl by Diablo Cody (yes, I'm way late and uncool). My ridiculously supportive quasi mother in law (the Other and I are thankfully not betrothed) gave it to me in an unmarked envelope and told me not to tell anyone that she was the one who gave it to me. Love her so much. She cracks me up. Now that I'm into the book I get why. This is definitely not something the ladies at book club would discuss. Hey anyone, ever been to Sex World? How about Dreamgirls? What did you think about Diablo Cody letting a girl suck on her......well you get the picture. I dare someone to come up with some literary questions for me to contemplate this Candy Girl....
Other than the my son's battle with the smoothie maker, I spent a good 20 hours trying to find shoes for my daughter. Not shoes with sparkles, bows, and slick black bottoms that are one step away from "I'm waitin' on my check from my baby daddy". Shoes for a one year old that don't slip when she walks and actually bend as in, baby walking here! Tell me why a 1yr old would need platform sandals? Anyone?
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